New Beginnings
12:21 p.m. - 2004-06-03

Well,

Tomorrow is my last day at my job. I cannot wait! I feel like a kid before Christmas! I am going to miss my friends sooo much. But damn it I won�t miss this hellhole. I�ve been at a lot worst places actually. But I am looking forward to a new beginning.

Speaking of new beginnings�..

I�m pregnant. Yes. I have very mixed feelings about this. First of all� no offense to those baby�s mothers out there, but I always felt I would be a wife. Not a BM! It�s killing me. I hate it. It�s not fair! Secondly� My family is going to be upset. I am almost two months and I haven�t yet told them. and to be honest I still don�t plan on saying anything anytime soon. Everyone thinks that this is an awful thing to do but I KNOW my mother. I told my brother, which means it�s just a matter of time before my mother finds out. And maybe that was just my copout. And Thirdly� I�m changing jobs. My new job has a 90-day probation period, at which time they will figure out that the kid is knocked-up. will they keep me? Will I lose my new job? Who knows. I will also have to pay for COBRA so I can get pre-natal care. That�s like $450 a month! Geesh! But I guess I better get used to putting out more money huh?

But don�t get me wrong. I think being a mommy is going to be cool. I just don�t know how to take it just yet. I guess when I can feel movement I�ll really believe it. Until then� I just don�t feel motherly.

All those mamas out there� HELP ME! AIM me or something! Meadow377

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